Everywhere you look it seems that there are people in love. They hold hands, they kiss, they gaze into each others' eyes, they play and most important, they connect.As an outsider looking in it seems that love must come easily. Love, for the most part, is a natural part of being alive.
Connecting to another human being is the hard part. It doesn't matter who you are, where you come from, or what your beliefs are, finding someone to love is a job all in itself.When you finally decide that the search is on, where do you begin? The tried and true method of being set up by a friend or relative on a blind date becomes old and boring like the last 10 dates you were on.
Meeting someone at work, that's a possibility, but also risky, because when it ends who gets to stay at the workplace? Are you a bar hopper? Singles do tend to hang out in crowds and the crowds tend to gravitate toward the bar. Online dating is probably the most popular resource, but it also has its' own downfalls and risks. Back to square one.Finding someone to love starts with you. Being familiar with your own tastes and desires is the beginning of forming a relationship with someone else.
Get to know what it is you want out of life and even more so, out of a relationship. Are you a whole person? Will the next person you allow into your personal space be only a fraction of a person who helps to make up the whole of you? Or is that person whole and healthy and able to give their self freely. Love is about coming into the relationship as a whole person ready, willing and able to complement one another, for better or for worse.
Connecting is more than just the kiss or gaze. It is a commitment to another soul that there is safety and trust in the bond. It is about loving and caring for another.Finding someone to love shouldn't be your part-time or full-time job.
Love will come when you fulfill this commitment to yourself. Lighten up. Work on who you are. What you want will come later.
Love is out there for you to find and hold onto. Be patient..Janet J.
Reiss, LCSW is a licensed clinical social worker in New York. Janet is also the owner of http://www.lookingforlove.com an online dating directory and resource guide.
By: Janet Reiss